ࡱ> GIF` &bjbjss 4@j j j j D  ]______$h2m mm }}}m:  ]}m]}}} PIj R}]0}z}} Q r} \N s mmmmdj j  Thank you for inviting us to speak to you today. I am Kelly Pilgrim-Byrne and this is my partner Sam Pilgrim-Byrne. We will both speak and Ill begin with a brief trip down memory lane. When I was a little girl of about 12, I set myself two goals. I would be married at 25 and would have two children by the age of 30. My family instilled in me a belief that I could accomplish anythingthat nothing was beyond me reachin essence, she was encouraged to dream. Sam and I met when I was 24 and she was 25that was 13 years ago and we still stand strongly side-by-side today despite the additional stressors placed on our relationship by Government and society. We are proud of this achievement. 鱨վ 1 year into our relationship we realised we couldnt accomplish everything we dreamed of, and that in fact, in this country, there was much that was beyond our reach as a same-sex couple. For instance, I could not fulfil my first dream of getting married to Sam at the age of 25. Thirteen years later, we still cant join this bedrock of society. Having a family, however, became possible 5 years ago, when in Western Australia, reproductive technologies became legally available to lesbians. We registered almost immediately, and after 2 years of counselling and self-reflection, both individually and as a couple, we started the clear path toward parenthood. Or so we thought. That was 3 years ago. We started off accessing Intrauterine Insemination (IUI) with donor sperm. Many women do become pregnant this way. Its relatively inexpensive at around $200 per month, nearly $5,000 a yearalthough none of it is claimable through Medicare (for opposite or same-sex couples). After 14 months of this, drugs were added to my protocolbringing the monthly expense to around $400. Again, no Medicare rebate. Another 6 months of this with no success and I was advised to try IVF. I have now completed four IVF cycles and another couple IUIs. Ive had 6 miscarriages. Fresh IVF cycles vary in cost between $2,500 and $5,500 (not including the doctors fees). Under the Medicare Safety-Net if youre a de facto couple, once you spend $1,000 out-of-pocket, you receive a rebate of 80% on the remainder of the claimable amount. The only problem for us is that we dont meet the definition of a de facto couple. According to the legislation, I am not Sams spouse and she is not mine. As a result, we individually have to meet out-of-pocket expenses of $1,000 each before any rebate can be sought. Thats twice as much as opposite-sex couples in Australia. Infertility is hard enough without having financial barriers placed in your way as well. Three years after starting treatment, we estimate we have spent at least $30,000. We have re-financed the home once, and will likely have to do so again, as I now begin my own treatment, again having to reach $1,000 out-of-pocket expenses before I can claim the rebate. As a couple, we have reached $1,000 several times over, but our input as a couple is invisible and now we start all over again. Often we sit in the waiting room of our fertility clinic and look around us at the many other couples struggling with infertility. What isnt lost on us, however, is that we pay more for our treatment than they do and that their struggle is legitimised by the Government with financial support that we dont receive. In addition to this, we are unable to relieve some of the financial hardship by taking advantage of federal legislation in other areassuch as taxation and superannuation. Where opposite sex couples can ease some of their burden by taking advantage of taxation offsets and contribution splitting, we are again treated as two single people. We pay twice into a system that provides no recognition of our long-term commitment to one another and we cant for the life of us understand why this is so. How this is fair. We are continually asked why we dont just adopt. The truth is, we would do so in a heartbeat, except that the countries that have an agreement with Australia will not adopt to gays or lesbians. We have heard rumblings that this may change in the future, however, the Liberal government has flagged its intention to place a ban on intercountry adoption to same-sex couples by the end of this year. They will do this even though we cant currently adopt anyway. They not only allow discrimination to occur by doing nothing to remove it, but seek out new ways of inflicting unequal treatment under the law. We have registered our interest in local adoption, but with just 7 children being available for adoption last year in WA, and over 100 heterosexual couples already on the waitlist, it is unlikely we will be selected by relinquishing parents. Thats a little bit about our journey to bring a child into this world, but what about when our child is finally here? Sam will continue from here In WA we are lucky enough to have some of the most progressive legislation in the country. Birth certificates have now been changed to rightly reflect non-traditional family structures instead of mother and father we now have parent. We have access to the Family Courts should relationships disintegrate. Parental issues are unlikely to occur in respect to schooling and medical decisions. In short we are recognised as a family Federally, as you are well aware this is not the case. This government, in refusing to recognise equal rights for GLBTI people, relegates us to the position of second-class citizens and puts not only our lives at risk both physically and emotionally but those of our children! This causes both of us more concern than we have ever held for ourselves. Same sex families have always existed and in the age-old Aussie way, have done it hard with little complaint. Federally, our children have only one legal parent. But it really is time for this to stop. Discrimination against people like Kelly and myself is systemic in this country and yet the Prime Minister continues to deny this to be the case. Earlier this year in Dublin when a university student asked him why gays and lesbians were still discriminated against in Australia, the Prime Minister not only denied this was the case but blatantly lied by telling the student and assembled media that, Most of the discrimination has been removed. He can continue to deny theres a problem and label us minority fundamentalists or he can choose to look beyond his personal beliefs and see us for who we really are. A couple like any other, trying to realise our childhood dreams under circumstances that can only be described as dream-destroying, and over time, soul-destroying. Coretta Scott King, the wife of the late Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., when speaking about equal rights for GLBTI people in America, said: For too long, our nation has tolerated the insidious form of discrimination against this group of Americans, who have worked as hard as any other group, paid their taxes like everyone else, and yet have been denied equal protection under the law.... I believe that freedom and justice cannot be parcelled out in pieces to suit political convenience. The same can be said for GLBTI Australiansand its time, once and for all, to bring it to an end. Thank you for listening. We sincerely hope this inquiry will enable real change to occur in this country, and that families like Kellys, who tell their children to reach for the stars and that nothing is unachievable, will be able to do so with confidence, knowing that their straight and gay children alike will have the same opportunities and be treated equally before the law. 7<JbestvE G \ ^ m n u      пﮠ h4hXCJ OJQJ^JaJ hTCJ OJQJ^JaJ h4h~CJ OJQJ^JaJ h4h"WFCJ OJQJ^JaJ h4hy3CJ OJQJ^JaJ hvOCJ OJQJ^JaJ h4hECJ OJQJ^JaJ 3 $ % a b t u mn@AKLdhgd4&  a d j  # $ % ? 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